How to Craft Your Essay for the Athletics Summer Scholarship

Brainstorming Across the Four Buckets

Gather material across four key areas to structure your essay effectively:

• Background: Reflect on your personal history, including family influences, significant experiences, or challenges that have shaped your educational aspirations.
• Achievements: List your academic and extracurricular accomplishments. Include specific metrics, such as GPA, leadership roles, or athletic achievements, that illustrate your dedication and capability.
• The Gap: Identify what you currently lack in terms of resources or experiences that this scholarship would help bridge. Be honest about your financial needs and articulate why further study at Loyola is essential for you.
• Personality: Infuse your essay with personal anecdotes or values that reflect who you are. This could include your motivations, passions, or unique perspectives that make you a compelling candidate.

Creating an Outline

Once you have your material, organize it into a coherent outline. Structure your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea, ensuring logical progression:

1. Introduction: Start with a specific moment or anecdote that captures your journey or aspirations.
2. Body Paragraphs: Dedicate sections to each of the four buckets, ensuring you reflect on the significance of each experience and how it relates to your goals.
3. Conclusion: Reinforce your commitment to your education and articulate how the scholarship will empower you to achieve your objectives.

Drafting Voice and Style

As you draft, maintain an active voice and be specific in your language. Avoid vague statements and clichés. Instead of saying you are “passionate about your studies,” illustrate this with examples of how you have demonstrated this passion through specific actions or achievements. Ensure your essay reflects your unique voice and perspective.

Revision and the “So What?” Factor

After completing your first draft, take a break before revising. When you return, read your essay with a critical eye. Ask yourself, “So what?” after each section. Ensure that each paragraph conveys not just what you did, but why it matters and how it contributes to your future goals. Seek feedback from trusted peers or mentors to refine your message.

Common Pitfalls to Avoid

Avoid the following mistakes in your essay:

• Starting with clichés or generic statements.
• Using passive voice when an active subject exists.
• Failing to provide specific examples or metrics to support your claims.
• Neglecting to connect your experiences to your future aspirations.