How to Write a Compelling Essay for the Smith Barney Scholarship

Brainstorming Across the Four Buckets

To create a strong foundation for your essay, explore the following four material buckets:

• Background: Reflect on your personal history, including family influences, educational experiences, and any challenges you’ve faced. Consider how these elements have shaped your aspirations.
• Achievements: List your academic and extracurricular accomplishments. Use specific metrics where possible, such as GPA, awards, or leadership roles that demonstrate your commitment and impact.
• The Gap: Identify what you currently lack in terms of education and how this scholarship will bridge that gap. Be specific about your educational goals and how they align with your career aspirations.
• Personality: Share personal anecdotes that reveal your values, motivations, and character. This is your opportunity to connect with the committee on a human level.

Outline Your Essay

After gathering your material, outline your essay to create a logical flow. A suggested structure includes:

1. Introduction: Start with a compelling in-scene moment or an impactful experience that draws the reader in.
2. Body Paragraphs: Dedicate each paragraph to one of the four buckets. Ensure each section transitions smoothly and builds on the previous one.
3. Conclusion: Reflect on your journey and the significance of the scholarship in your future. Reinforce how your education will enable you to contribute positively to society.

Drafting Voice and Style

As you draft your essay, maintain an active voice and specific language. Avoid vague statements; instead, provide concrete examples and details that illustrate your points. Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea and contributes to the overall narrative. Remember to answer the “So what?” question in each section, reflecting on the significance of your experiences and aspirations.

Revision and “So What?”

After completing your draft, take a break before revising. Look for areas where you can enhance clarity and impact. Ask yourself if each section answers the “So what?” question, demonstrating how your experiences have prepared you for future challenges and opportunities. Peer feedback can also be invaluable in this stage.

Common Pitfalls to Avoid

Be mindful of the following pitfalls:

• Avoid clichéd openers and filler phrases that do not add value to your narrative.
• Steer clear of vague expressions of passion; instead, provide specific examples that showcase your commitment.
• Do not use passive voice where an active subject exists; this weakens your message.
• Ensure all facts and experiences are truthful and verifiable; do not embellish your achievements.